Tag: fiction writing
Fine Tuning Your Novel
You’ve read through your novel for the umpteenth time and can barely look at it anymore. Then your advance reading copy or final pdf file arrives, and it’s time for a last glance before sending your baby into the world. Will you still find changes to make? Undoubtedly. Sometimes these are conversion errors. Or you may notice typos or word choices that need a tweak.
Trimmed to Death, #15 in the Bad Hair Day Mysteries, is set to debut on Sept. 25. Check out the latest changes I’ve made and you’ll gain some insight into the mind of a writer. Caution – There may be spoilers.
p. 74 – bustled … bustle.
A few minutes later, Janet bustled down the stairs along with her housekeeper. After giving the woman an order and watching her bustle off toward another part of the house, Janet turned to Marla.
Change “bustle” to “scurry” so it reads …watching her scurry off…
p. 78 – “get involved” x 2
Janet clapped her hands. “It sounds wonderful. I’d love to get involved. Tony, you could ask Tristan to donate some of his desserts. You cross paths on occasion.” She turned to Marla. “His restaurant buys vegetables from our farm. They like to advertise how their dishes contain ingredients from sustainable food sources.”
“That would be amazing if his restaurant would get involved in our charity event. They’d benefit from the publicity as well.”
Change “I’d love to get involved” to “be included.” So it should say, I’d love to be included.
p. 103 –Marla winced. “I know what you mean. I’m wondering if you knew Francine Dodger, publisher of Eat Well Now magazine.
Delete “Marla winced” on this line. I use “wince” too many times.
p. 125 – “It says, ‘Meet me at midnight by the Living Tree. All hail Osiris.’ “
Last quote mark is reversed.
p. 148 – “You can tell, huh? Your dad called with bad news. Another woman is his case was found dead.” Change “is” to “in”
p. 154 – “Why are you so afraid, Janet?
Add quote mark at end of sentence
p. 161 – “Actually, I came to order lunch. Can get you get me a turkey delight to go?”
Can get you get me. Delete first “get”
p. 165 – “Lynette theorized that Francine would have made an effort to buy the magazine from the conglomerate that owns it.
Made an offer, not made an effort. Change effort to offer.
p. 170 – “I’ll give you a taste of our olive oil varieties after we return.”
Marla’s jaw dropped as she noticed the variety of goods for sale.
Varieties … variety. Change “variety” of goods to “range” of goods
p. 178 – Used “message” x 3.
Chills ran up Marla’s spine as she scanned the message. Mind your own business or you’ll be next.
[Chapter Break]
“It looks as though the message was printed on a sheet of white computer paper.” Marla snapped a photo and messaged it to Dalton.
Change “messaged” to “sent” in this last sentence.
p. 180 – The word “property” is used too many times.
“Without color of title means we’ve been paying property taxes and any liens on the property, as well as meeting the other conditions. Besides occupying the property for a minimum of seven years, we have to be in open use of the property, essentially acting as the sole owner.”
Change “occupying the property” to “occupying the place”
p. 199 – Used “man” x 3.
“If his column is losing readers, it’s because the man has lost his edge.”
“Could he have wanted to get her out of the way?” Dalton studied the other man’s face.
“Are you kidding? Man, that guy couldn’t hurt a fly. He doesn’t have it in him.”
Remove this “Man” and just say, “That guy couldn’t hurt a fly.
p. 204 – She could have quite a list of personal indiscretions hidden away. Change to: She could have had quite a … Add “had” in this sentence. This refers to the victim.
p. 231 – Used “took” x 2
The camera wasn’t in Francine’s purse and hasn’t been turned in by anyone.”
“Do you believe the killer took it?”
“It’s possible. The pictures Francine took could be useful to the case.”
Change to, Do you believe the killer kept it?
p. 249 – Referencing Marla’s stepdaughter in this paragraph:
Meanwhile, it promised to be a bumpy ride. Dalton likely wouldn’t approve of any guy she brought home for them to meet until he’d done a thorough background check and conducted a personal interview. She couldn’t blame the girl for being guarded about her love life and had to trust her to make the right decisions.
Change “she” to “Marla” in the beginning of this sentence to clarify: Marla couldn’t blame the girl for being guarded about her love life and had to trust her to make the right decisions.
Recipes:
p. 274: spice cake mix is not capitalized
p. 275: Yellow Cake Mix is capitalized
Choose one or the other for consistency
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Where Do You Write?
“Where do you write?” is a common question for writers during book talks. Readers might imagine us toiling away on an old typewriter in some attic with a tiny window. Or perhaps they see us working on a sleek laptop while enjoying the breeze from a seaside veranda. We could be creating our masterpiece in solitude while viewing a lake and sipping tea on a screened patio as crickets drone in the nearby woods. Or maybe we pound away on our keyboards while drinking coffee at the local Starbucks. Don’t you see folks there working on their laptops and wonder if they are aspiring writers?
My work environment is more mundane. I work at home. I have a dedicated home office. I am surrounded by things I love, such as books and memorabilia and gifts I’ve bought myself to commemorate my published works.
I love my corner desk so much that I don’t ever want to leave this house. As I sit here now, straight ahead is my Dell computer monitor. I use an ergonomic keyboard by Adesso that has saved my wrists. On shelves above, I have writer-related gifts from my kids and others, and a collection of trolls to represent the Trolleks who are the bad guys in my Drift Lords series.
Looking to my left, down below are lots of drawers. One extension to my desk serves as a printer stand. Above this are my latest plotting notebooks, some books on writing, and proofs for my latest works in print. On the very top are a collection of novelty pens and a train locomotive from a fan painted with the cover from Murder by Manicure. Most treasured behind a glass door are my Flamingo Award from MWA Florida Chapter and a Lifetime Service Award from Florida Romance Writers. Behind these awards is a signed photograph from Star Trek star Jonathan Frakes.
To my right are how-to writing books in the crime fiction field, copies of all my books in various print formats, a jeweled calculator, a world clock, and a pencil holder from Area 51. Flashlights, emergency radios, and portable lanterns stand at the ready on every surface in case we have a power blackout during hurricane season.
Bored yet? We’re not done! I have a separate mahogany desk for correspondence, and this is where I pay bills and do the household accounts. Above this is a bulletin board and various medals and framed certificates for accolades I have earned.
The closet in this former bedroom had been converted into bookshelves before we moved in and was one reason why we loved the house. The shelves are totally full. Besides my reference books on all subjects and more books on writing, I have a paperweight collection, an onyx chess set, a sword I bought in Spain, and other tchotchkes.
The room is completed by three more sets of plastic drawers from office supply stores, mailing supplies, two tall bookcases, and more reference materials.
I spend all day in this room. It’s my home within a home. Can I work elsewhere? I’ll dabble at marketing and revisions when away from home, but I can only create in this environment with silence for company. No background music or coffee house chatter for me. I need quiet.
I hope you have enjoyed this glimpse into my work space. Now for those stacks of papers that need filing…. Until next time!
The In-Between Game
What do you do when you’re in between books but you have too much going on to start the next novel? You might be waiting to hear back from your editor or beta readers or cover designer if the book is done.
I’m in this situation now. I have four projects pending release but am in a holding pattern until I hear back from various sources. As I write this piece, Body Wave Audiobook is complete and waiting publication by Audible. Trimmed to Death is awaiting feedback from beta readers and a mockup design from my cover artist. Hairball Hijinks, a short story that includes an epilogue to Hair Brained, will include a teaser chapter from Trimmed to Death, so this one has to wait until there’s a pre-order link for that title. And Writing the Cozy Mystery: Expanded Second Edition uses examples from Trimmed to Death so is best to come after that title is published.
In the meantime, I don’t want to get involved in plotting the next project. Instead, I am spending time on some of the following activities. Here are suggestions for what you can do when you’re in a similar holding pattern before a new release and you don’t want to work on another book:
· Prepare your book launch announcement
· Write all the blogs for a blog tour
· Do an optional book trailer as a bonus for your readers
· Start a Pinterest storyboard for your new release
· Prepare for speaker engagements with handouts and PowerPoint presentations
· Update your reviewer list by marking which people reviewed your last title
· Review your front and back materials for each indie book project
· Determine if you’ll have an online launch party and plan ahead for this event
· Update your mailing list and work on your next newsletter
· Create memes relating to your new book
· Write a Reader Discussion Guide for book clubs
· Update your bio on all social media sites
If you’d rather engage in brainless activities for a break, you can always clean out old files, update your blog index, rearrange your online photos, or go through the stack of papers in your to-do pile. As soon as your book is ready to go, you’ll be plenty busy. So take advantage of this lull while you can.
What else do you do in between book projects, besides doing preliminary research and jotting down plot ideas for the next story?
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Inconsistent Characters
Revisions for our novels should include a complete read-through for repetitions and inconsistencies. What do we mean by the latter? You’ll want to take a look at your characters to see if they are behaving in a manner consistent with their personality. As a writer, this should be an essential part of your self-editing process. Below are some examples.
What’s wrong with this passage?
Dalton went for his gun, but Marla slapped his hand away. “Don’t risk it. You don’t know what we’re up against yet. And they won’t know you’re armed.”
Marla would never slap Dalton’s hand away. He’s a police officer. He knows his business. He’s allowed her to come along on a night mission, which she shouldn’t jeopardize this way.
Often it’s my critique group that catches these kinds of mistakes. In this case, I read those sentences and frowned. Wait a minute. Marla would never do this. I went back and changed it.
Ditto for Marla acting dumb. My editor has caught me on this one more than a few times. “Marla is too smart not to figure this out when everyone else knows what’s going on.” She isn’t acting in character when she’s too dense. Same goes for Dalton. Should he let Marla accompany him to interview suspects without protesting or finding an important reason for her to come along?
This also goes for mannerisms of speech. Your rough-around-the-edges hero isn’t going to suddenly say, “Oh, good heavens.” His dialogue should be consistent with his personality.
Here are more examples from my current work-in-progress. Marla and Dalton are talking about the victim.
“That would have given someone plenty of time to whack her on the head and get away,” Dalton said.
“Do you truly believe another person did this to her?” Marla’s glance darted to the rows of strawberry plants, the water-lined canal, and the tall sugar cane. Was the culprit watching them from some hidden viewpoint? Should they be worried he might return?
My editor said, It’s obvious another person did this to her. Could the woman whack herself on the back of her head?
“This injury is indicative of a blow to the back of the head,” Dalton replied. “The medical examiner will determine the exact cause of death, though.”
Would he say this to Marla when the gash is evident? Not according to my editor, who wrote, “This is another dumb remark. Of course matted blood to the back of the head is “indicative” of a blow to the back of the head!!!”
I’m lucky my editor isn’t afraid to call the shots as she sees them. She’s always right. Here is my rewrite. See what you think:
“So that would have given someone plenty of time to whack her on the head and get away.”
“Are you certain the blow is what killed her?” Marla’s glance darted to the rows of strawberry plants, the water-lined canal, and the tall sugar cane. Was the culprit watching them from some hidden viewpoint? Should they be worried he might return?
“That’s not for me to say, but it would be my best guess. The medical examiner will determine the exact cause of death.”
We hope to catch these errors during the revision process. What we write during the heat of the story-making process doesn’t always pass muster when examined under the editorial microscope.
Inconsistent Characters in your Novel #amwriting #revisions Share on X12 Steps for Revising Your Novel
Revisions on your novel can seem like a never-ending task. This seems especially true when you get a letter from a reader years later to tell you about a misspelled word. We’re never going to get it absolutely perfect, but we can do our best.
In an earlier post, I’d mentioned the Five Stages of Writing. I’ve also talked in other posts about line editing and other techniques for improving your work. What comes next after you’ve sent the book in to your editor? Here’s a list of suggestions:
1. Make the corrections advised by your editor when she sends your story back with comments.
2. Check your formatting throughout the manuscript after making a series of changes. Be sure all chapter headings are consistent. Turn on the paragraph symbol in Word and look for misplaced sentences or extra spaces. Do a search for [space]^p and replace with ^p. Then do a search for ^p[space] and replace with ^p. This gets rid of extra spaces before and after a paragraph.
3. Review your editor’s comments to make sure you haven’t skipped anything.
4. Revise the synopsis and chapter outlines to reflect any changes to the story or the timeline.
5. Do a thorough read-through to make sure everything reads smoothly and to see if you caught all the changes. One change may lead to another, and you might miss some if they’re one or two lines here and there.
6. Do another read-through if these second round of changes were significant.
7. Consider using a software program like Smart-Edit to check for redundancies, repetitions, or clichés that your editor might have missed. (Or do this step before you turn in your manuscript for the first time.)
8. Send the book to beta readers for another round of critiques from the readers’ viewpoint and for proofreading. If you are traditionally published, this is when you send the book in for copy edits.
9. Follow-up with another round of revisions and a complete read-through again.
10. Send in the finalized book to your editorial house or to your formatter for production.
11. Read through the entire ARC (advance reading copy) for conversion errors and final tweaks.
12. Approve the final version.
What else do you do during the Revisions Stage?
Holding Patterns
Sometimes as writers, we have to wait on others to progress with our current works in progress. When you are waiting for the copy edits from your traditional publisher, for example, is one instance of this. We play the waiting game when we send in submissions, anticipate our advance reading copies, or expect our edits to come any day. It’s part of the game. What you need to do during this time of inactivity is to either work on your next project or focus on marketing strategies.
As part of my goals for this year as mentioned in an earlier post, I plan to have five releases. Two of these objectives have been met. Silver Serenade came out in a revised ebook edition and Died Blonde made a revised paperback debut. What about the rest?
I’m waiting on my developmental editor for Trimmed to Death, the next Bad Hair Day mystery.
I’m waiting on my narrator for the audiobook edition of Body Wave.
I’m waiting on my cover artist for the expanded second edition of Writing the Cozy Mystery.
Am I planning a marketing campaign for any of these projects or working on the next creative endeavor in the meantime? Sorry…but no. This break comes at a good time. Our daughter is getting married. My spare moments are taken up with researching bridal shower venues and mother-of-the-bride dresses. This is a big reason why you’re not hearing from me so much on this blog at present. If you like, I can discuss the restaurants we’ve visited and the beautiful dresses I’m seeing, but it’s not writing advice. It is life experience. Depends on which journey you want to read about here.
I’m not totally lazing about, however. I have been preparing three PowerPoint presentations for upcoming events. See my Appearances page if you wish to know where I’ll be speaking. And I’m revising Keeper of the Rings, an earlier science fiction romance. So I am still being productive even if it’s not on the three projects above.
Things are bound to get more intense as the nuptials get closer, so I might have to put off one of my planned releases until later in the year. A book release requires a lot of effort if you mean to send out review copies, write blogs for blog tours, plan launch parties, and more. And all of these three projects will require special attention in that way. So their releases will have to be spaced out accordingly.
What do you work on while you’re in a holding pattern for your current project?
Strengthen Your Chapter Endings
It’s imperative for pacing and suspense in your novel to keep the reader turning pages. We’ve discussed End of Chapter Hooks here before. If you have a weak ending, it’s tempting for readers to put down your book. This isn’t what you want. You need an element to strengthen your chapter’s final words.
Here’s an example of a weak ending from Trimmed to Death, my work-in-progress. Marla is speaking to Nicole, another hairdresser, at her salon.
“Dalton wants to take a drive north on Sunday. He says the Kinsdales have a cousin in central Florida who owns an olive grove. This man might be able to shed some light on matters.”
Nicole chuckled, a low throaty sound. “Sounds like a good excuse for a day trip. Relax and enjoy the outing. You don’t have to be back at work until Tuesday.”
This passage illustrates another item to watch for when editing your work. Don’t repeat information your characters already know. Why would Nicole tell Marla that she doesn’t have to be back at work until Tuesday? Marla knows her days off.
Here is how I changed this into a better ending, at least for now. I might work on it further, but this one is an improvement over the previous version. Let me know what you think.
“Dalton wants to take a drive north on Sunday. He says the Kinsdales have a cousin in central Florida who owns an olive grove. This man might be able to give us some answers.”
Nicole chuckled, a low throaty sound. “Sounds like a good excuse for a day trip. Relax and enjoy the outing. Temps are supposed to be in the seventies. Take advantage of the good weather while it lasts.”
Marla should heed her words. Even though the winter months could bring cold air to the south, the next storm season was always around the corner… same as the killer in their latest crime case.
This edition might not be perfect, but it’s better than the first. And so it goes when you line edit your work. Strengthen your sentences and chapter endings so they have more of an emotional impact.
Strengthen your Chapter Endings #amwriting #writetip Share on X
Bait and Switch Tactics for Writers
Bait and Switch Tactics are a means to keep your reader on the edge of her seat when using multiple viewpoints. What you’ll want to do is isolate your characters, then write scenes in each person’s viewpoint with a cliffhanger at the end of every sequence. Make sure in each scene that you are in one character’s head so the reader can identify and care about this person. Then they’ll be to turn the pages to see what happens next.
Take the main characters in SILVER SERENADE as an example. In this science fiction romance, Silver is an assassin whose assignment is to kill Tyrone Bluth, leader of Tyrone’s Marauders. Jace Vernon, a hunted criminal, needs the terrorist alive to prove his innocence.
In one scene, Silver and Jace confront the terrorist leader in his lair. The purpose of this scene is to deliver important information to propel the action forward. To raise the suspense, I have isolated our protagonists. Here is how the scene breaks down into several sequences [spoiler alert]:
- Jace’s viewpoint. Jace and Silver, in disguise, present themselves as new recruits for Bluth’s terrorist network. They look for their contact, Gruber, at a saloon on the planet Al’ron. While sitting at the bar, Silver shrugs off a roughneck patron who makes a play for her. The fellow insults Jace, who kills him. After this display, their contact approaches and introduces them to the bandit leader. Impressed by Jace’s quick response, Bluth says they passed the first test. He’ll take Silver with him to his headquarters, but Jace must follow them alone in his ship. Jace fears for Silver’s safety. Or worse, will she use this opportunity to assassinate Bluth and leave him behind?
- Silver’s viewpoint. She is on a firing range at headquarters for Tyrone’s Marauders, being tested for her skills as a sharpshooter. She passes the test. Her supervisor marches her to the detention center where the evil Bluth snatches a captive child from his mother’s arms and demands Silver shoot him. Tempted to aim her laser rifle at Bluth instead, Silver manages to demonstrate her skill in a less lethal manner. During their dialogue, she learns a piece of important information. Bluth leads her away, while she wonders what’s happened to Jace who has failed to show up. Has he been caught?
- Jace’s viewpoint. Jace’s cover has been blown, and Bluth arrives to torture him in his prison cell. Bluth questions him about his contact, Gruber. Was Gruber duped by Jace, or was he a willing accomplice? Jace turns the interrogation around when he learns important news about his missing sister’s whereabouts. But what chills him is Bluth’s boast that Silver waits for him in his chamber, unaware the pirate knows full well who she really is and why she’s there.
- Silver’s viewpoint: Silver eludes her warden and seeks to rescue Jace. In the hallway, she hears approaching footsteps. She whips inside the nearest unlocked suite. It belongs to Bluth’s chief financial officer. After rendering the man unconscious, Silver copies data from his computer. This information may help prove Jace’s innocence and could also be used to cut off Bluth’s funding at its source. But this data will only be useful if she can escape the complex. How can she reach the detention center and free Jace?
- Jace’s viewpoint: Guards arrive to march Jace from his cell, and he figures he’s marked for death.
And so on. You get the idea? When I began this scene, I had no idea how it would play out. The sequences developed as I wrote, but each time I was in one character’s head, I left them at a critical juncture. Hopefully that will induce you, the reader, to keep turning pages to see what happens to them next.
In summary, to increase suspense, isolate your main characters and leave each one in jeopardy or fearing for the other’s safety at the end of each sequence. Switch back and forth until they meet again. This technique has been used successfully in many thrillers, and you can deploy it for your story as well. Hook your readers and reel them in!
Bait and Switch Tactics for Writers #amwriting #writetip Share on X
Thank You for Following
I want to offer a big Thank You to my blog followers for sticking with me through the years. You have my special gratitude if you’ve left comments, liked a post, tweeted one or shared it on Facebook. I’m especially touched when you come up to me at a conference and mention that you appreciate my blog. I send these messages out into cyberspace without knowing if anyone reads them. So it’s most gratifying to get any kind of feedback.
As a gift to you in return, I’d like to offer you the chance to win a $15 Fandango gift card, so you can see one of the latest movies. All you have to do is comment below and your name will be entered. The drawing will take place in two days.
In your comment, let me know, if you wish, what you like about this blog, what you dislike, or what kinds of articles you’d like to see more of in the future.
Meanwhile, have a safe, happy, and healthy New Year!
All the best always,
Nancy